Smells like a camp fire

Smells like a camp fire

Now your butt parts can be less offensive.

I sadly have to admit it that I grew up in a family where a few members decided that farting was funny and the more rank, the better. It made me a bitter person and one who wished there was a way to take away their joy, while also becoming overly self conscious myself. Thankfully it appears that I'm not alone in my phobia of obnoxious flatus ruining my day; some brilliant people came up with sort of a solution.Colonial Medical Assisted Devices is currently selling "flat-D," which is basically a pad you wear inside your undies that is filled with charcoal to filter out any scent than manages to escape your exhaust port. A few other devices of similar design are floating about as well. I do applaud them to a degree, and admit there are few options in how to apply such a product without having to go into "installed" filters, but seriously? A pad? Some people already have to deal with that, they don't need another!

On the upside, eventually these will become so simplistic and easy to replicate that nursing homes will be able to buy them by the ton and give them to all the old people who can't help but let them slip with every step they take, or pregnant women. Hey, you deal with that much weight pressing down on you! Now the real magic comes if they ever get around to producing them for dogs. There is something about them that they can't be gassy without it being something mildly related to mustard gas or other forms of chemical warfare.